BUT for you, O Lord ...

Written as part of the She Reads Truth #SheSharesTruth experiment

Read Psalm 38

Psalm 38 is just not my thing until I get to vs. 15. I’m generally a pretty upbeat person and really don’t like whining and self-pity. And verses 1-14 had a WHOLE LOT of those two things that I don’t like!

BUT in vs. 15 – the only verse I marked in this passage, there’s a shift. “But for you, O Lord, do I wait; it is you, O Lord my God, who will answer.” YES! This turning to God part is something I can grab ahold of. Something I can relate to. Well, technically, I can relate to verses 1-14 too: I have been and certainly still become burdened by my sins and guilt. I can see myself for what I am and am really disgusted by my natural man sometimes. I can be foolish. And I’ve certainly had the feeling of having no one understand what I am going through. BUT wallowing is just not my way. I’d rather WAIT for God to ANSWER than wallow. I think it’s because there’s something hopeful in waiting.

Waiting implies expectancy. It implies that the answer is coming – just not right now, or maybe I just don’t know when. BUT if I’m waiting, it’s because I BELIEVE it’s coming in some form or fashion at some point or other. And I can believe in believing.

The rest of the chapter, he still bemoans his state; BUT it’s different. It’s from the lens of the wait, the hope. And there’s confession. In the first 14 verses, there was an acknowledgement of sin in order to point out that God was punishing him for it. BUT the remaining verses show real penitence, which is what we are called to. Not just owning up to the fact that we sin, but turning from it, and recognizing that God is THE ANSWER to our need for salvation.

I also relate to the “Make haste to help me” request in vs. 22. Because at the end of the day, he’s still human. And he still needs relief. And we always want help to come as quickly as possible. So, he’ll wait; he knows God will answer. But if he could just have one other small request, it would be that it happens tomorrow.

May we not lose hope in our tomorrows, no matter how long they last. And may we continue to lean on the confidence that he is our Lord and God “who WILL answer”.

~ Signing off under my SRT identity “JessicaLoves___”*

  

*The blank is meant as an intentional reminder to myself that I am to actively love Christ and all those he puts in my path.

Steadfast

Written as part of the She Reads Truth #SheSharesTruth experiment

Read Psalm 130

Steadfast is not a word that we often use. I think the reason for this is that so few things in our lives are actually steadfast. Steadfast generally means fixed, firm, unwavering. In fact, in my dictionary app, the word “firm” is used in three of the five definitions: 1) firm in purpose, resolution, faith, attachment, as a person 2) firmly established, as an institution or state of affairs and 3) firmly fixed in place or position.

God’s love is not going anywhere! It’s there. It’s steadfast. We may come and go in loving him, or in showing that we love him by following him. But at the end of the day, if/when we come to him (or come back to him, as the case may be), he’s there. But the thing is: he never leaves us. He is always there. We don’t escape him when we pull away. We don’t escape him when we sin. We don’t escape him when we lose a bit of ourselves to the world. We just escape feeling the love that is always there for us. We put a barrier between ourselves and God when we stop living like him that makes it hard for us to feel his love. But it’s not because the love lessens or goes away. In fact, there’s nothing that can shake his firm, fixed, unwavering love for us. But how can this be?

Because of his abundant, plentiful redemption. We know that, in our relationships, they don’t work if we aren’t willing to forgive. They just don’t. People aren’t perfect; and if we can’t forgive them, we don’t really love them. But God’s redemption is more than that. It’s more than us saying “sorry” and him saying “I forgive you”. Our understanding of God’s mercy and redemption is often limited to us having guilt, apologizing and getting an “It’s OK. I still love you” feeling.

But the redemption of our lives from sin and the resulting eternal death is SO MUCH BIGGER than this type of forgiveness. Redemption comes at a cost. When we redeem a coupon, the company that lured us to the store to buy their item had to take a hit to their bottom line for us to purchase said item. Our acceptance of their offer actually hurts them in some ways. But it’s worth it to them for us to have their product. And let’s be real: What God’s offering is SO MUCH BIGGER than anything we could ever redeem from any store on earth; and the cost to him – the sacrifice of his son Jesus – is so much greater. But it was WORTH IT to him. Because he loves us! And the awesome thing is: his redemption is there for the taking. It’s always there, just like his love. We have only to come to him, confess to him and let him in. He is always there, waiting, to make good on his offer to love steadfastly and redeem with abundance.